This holistic 10 week psycho-education and experiential course which will commence in early September 2020. On this course you the participant to overcome the ravages of sexual abuse that have had such a traumatic effect on their childhood, adolescence and adult life.
The effects sexual abuse on the individual is all encompassing. Many survivors both male and female report that that they do not value themselves, often settle for second best. Many get into relationships and jobs which they know aren’t right – but they settle believing that they don’t deserve any better.
In contrast many survivors are also perfectionists and are mercilessly over demanding and highly critical of themselves as trying to over prove themselves to others in a bid to be seen as a person of worth whilst keeping the secret of what happened to them locked away. However nobody heals through secrets.
Sexual abuse in men and women can lead to intimacy difficulties. They may find it difficult to connect in relationships or become controlling, or needy and may objectify their partner as a means to gain power in the relationship which not only pushes the partner away when these approaches do not work but also reaffirm to the survivor that they are un-loveable.
Women also may find it difficult to engage fully in relationships. The lack of trust that they feel from being abused can cause a barrier to women letting their guard down and becoming vulnerable which is part of the process of building a relationship. Because being vulnerable in relationships is difficult many survivors may find it hard to let go and have fun because they can be over vigilant and wary of letting other people in – which often accelerates the feelings of loneliness, unworthiness and a deep longing for love and acceptance.
Alternatively both men and women survivors may act out of their pain. Because their physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual boundaries have been broken repeatedly they may use acting out behaviours as a way to bury their pain, in order to experience love and acceptance from others. These behaviours may include drinking to excess. Addiction (in many forms), and promiscuity.
Alcohol is a suppressant –which if overused can numb the pain of abuse but also leave the girl vulnerable to being further abused and used by others. Girls who misuse alcohol or other substances may inadvertently get involved in relationships where they get the wrong from men who will hurt them all over again which reinforces their lack of self -esteem and their self- worth. This coupled with the unremitting, critical and judgemental voice inside their head makes it very difficult to build the confidence to move on with their lives.
Men feeling that they are not enough may take on the persona of being Alpha Male. Acting out in many ways, through work, gym, addiction, affairs, gambling, or by humiliating and making fun of other people. Many male survivors had reported that they take on the persona of being ‘A Mans, Man’ to mask the pain, loneliness and disconnection they feel deep within.
If this article speaks to you then don’t despair, a new dawn awaits you where you can begin to let go of your pain and the belief that who you are isn’t enough. You are and have always been strong enough, beautiful enough, talented enough, but you were tainted by the behaviours of others who should have been there to love and protect you.
These people were supposed to be safe, responsible, trusting and reliable for you in your life. They were supposed to be there for you to help you to foster and develop all your unique characteristics, talents. and gifts and project them into the world, and let the wonder of the person that you are unfold in its own time just as the Rose open itself up in all its beauty in its own time.
This was stolen from you, and this is why you developed the behaviours you did to cope with those terrible things that may have happened to you
You see sexual abuse is not about sex. It is about power and this power was taken from you by people who were in a trusted position so it is no wonder that you find it difficult to let anybody in. If someone you trusted , hurt you then it is only natural that you would be wary of letting anyone get close to you .If you were humiliated , it is only natural that you would develop behaviours that you appear tough and overtly strong , because you don’t want to be humiliated again , If you were used by others , it is only natural that you will overly nice so that you won’t be used or hurt by others again, but in being overly nice people may take advantage of you just like when you were young and vulnerable. So your behaviours worked, people don’t get close or hurt you , but unfortunately you don’t get close to others either and you don’t get to experience the love and affirmation that you yearn for deep within.
It is time to forgive yourself and the behaviours you used to cope with the pain of the past because what happened to you in your life was not your fault. The behaviours that you have used to cope with and get through the traumas that you experienced were your best way to deal with what happened to you, but what may have worked on the past for you is no longer an effective way to numb your trauma now. In fact these behaviours that you used to cope with your pain are now the very behaviours that entrap you from living your best life –and for expressing the truth of who you are out to the world.
In mid -September we are offering a ten week holistic psycho-education and experiential course that will assist you to overcome the ravages of sexual abuse that have had such a traumatic effect on their childhood and adolescence and as adult.
We offer separate courses for men and women. There will be a male and female psychotherapist and facilitator in each group
On this course you will be able learn the following
- Learn how to release the pain and trauma from your past in a safe, secure and loving environment.
- Relaxation skills to be more present in the moment , and get more clarity to respond rather than react to the events that impact on your life
- Recognise weak and rigid boundaries and learn to set healthy boundaries that will build your self- esteem and confidence and foster the seeds of self- worth to grow.
- You will also learn the 4 Rs technique. This will assist you to have more control and balance I your life
- Learn to correct the faulty and biased thoughts on how you see yourself, to a place where you can be more compassionate and loving to the person that you truly are
- Through psychotherapeutic techniques, as well as CBT and Transactional Analyses you will learn how to become more assertive and confident when engaging with the world around you.
- You will also be given a strategic toolbox full of interventions for when the going gets tough to conquer anxiety, stress and low self- esteem and tension from triggers that may impact on your life from time to time from the world around you.
- You will also learn about mindfulness , living in the present moment
- You will learn Shamanic and Energy therapy interventions, creative visualisations, and journeys to your higher self, and your spirit guides to access wisdom and guidance for moving forward in your life.
- You will also learn journeys to connect to the inner child, hurt person within to offer healing to that hurt part of yourself.
- Detailed notes from each workshop will be given to participants so that you can rebuild and move forward in your life on your terms.
RISING FROM THE ASHES OF SEXUAL ABUSE – 10 WEEK WORKSHOP
When: This ten week workshop will commence on Wednesday 16th September 2020 for men and Thursday 17th September for women.
Where: Dublin Wellness Centre, 24 South Frederick Street, Dublin 2 (Off Nassau Street).
Time: 7pm -9:30pm
Fee: €60 per week for each workshop
Availability is limited to 10 people in each workshop so early booking is advisable.
For More Information on this course please feel free to contact Gerard Mc Nevin on 0866070260 or email firstname.lastname@example.org. You can find out more about Gerard by googling Siochan Counselling which will direct you to his website and the he provides.
If you would prefer to do individual sessions to work on your trauma that you experience in a safe secure, loving and confidential space then Gerard offer Energy Therapy, Shamanic and Spiritual healing sessions –which is very effective in releasing the trauma from the past and help you to move forward in your life.